Trafalgar at Christmas

Embankment Christmas Market

Perfect for gift ideas!

South Molton Street's a wee bit festive.

Hold on... Are the women in the foreground sinisterly plotting something!?

Public Toilet Graffiti

Not too sure what statement the previous occupant is making... Perhaps it is a derogatory remark to the individuals friend? Or a proposition (Dildo Dave?) or a cautionary reminder (Dildo, Dave.).

At the end of the day, isn't it better to be Dildo Dave than Syphilis Steve or Warty Walter?

Post Office Blues

More amusing is the paranoid glances I received when I took this picture.

Why are all patrons of the post office so miserable? Smile - There are foil christmas decorations on the ceiling!

British Countryside

Bloody dismal, isn't it? Not that I don't enjoy rain being blasted horizontally into my face by winds that threaten to knock me to the ground, but it makes my hair wildly uncontrollable!

My hat can't handle this kind of weather, I need to invest in an umbrella. I'm bloody drenched now. Yippee!

Fuckin' big chime...

So this is how I'll spend my day...

Can't complain! In fact, the decor is most aesthetically pleasing! Despite the fact its bloody freezing on the Isle of Wight, mainly due to the fact that regardless of how far inland one is its still on the coast, I think I'll remain here... Oh, someone just bought me a coffee, for sooth I shalt remain a while longer!

It seems that I arrived before myself...

... And had been waiting a very long time.

Need I really put a title?

I've tried to come up with something witty about this picture, mostly along the lines of me looking slightly Amish, but none of them have been quite up to my comic standards. So, here is me taking a picture of myself in the mirror. Gripping stuff, isn't it?

Apparently I can't fix printers...

If it's broken, I will try to fix it, without consulting a technical manual... The result, a hand that resembles a piece of art by Jackson Pollock. Plus, anything I now attempt to print now has a lovely red tint to it. Good to know I'm so technically adept...

These are the voyages...

Well, after a week-long illness (origin unknown) I am finally recovering. Laryngital symptoms are fading slowly but surely, my voice no longer makes me sound like a Dalek, and I can breathe through my nose once more. The cure, it would seem, could be found in tea and biscuits and about 12 episodes of Star Trek... The downside of this is that I now need to catch up with a week's worth of work, and I'm still not at peak performance yet! Hopefully I'll be well enough to return to normal life in the next day or two, as the healing process does appear to be accelerating...

Anyway, now I'm back on the internet and so on, I'm searching for cheap travel and accommodation in Penzance for the end of October. It's not as easy as it sounds!

Evening London

Mocha and Morality

A spinoff of the popular BBC show Jam and Jerusalem, Mocha and Morality takes place in a London cafe focussing on the life and work of a contemporary philosopher. The series will address modern moral problems, such as 'is black better than white?' and 'is this milk soya?'

To those who hadn't already guessed, it's a slow day in London! It's overcast with a cold breeze, and I really am unsure whether this is soya milk or not...

They're taking the piss...

The bastards charged me £14 for a locker on ground level no higher than my bloody shoe! I suppose it's somehow my fault for wanting some form of storage! I now need to hire either a contortionist or a very small person to open the damn thing... Either that or a chiropractor to mend my spine after using my locker.

Ah well, what did I expect? There's probably someone jumping to try and reach their locker somewhere...

I feel alienated...

Trust the Chelsea area to have a prejudice against me! What am I meant to do if I need to make an emergency call? Ask someone to do it for me, I guess... Ah well.

The Long Dark Teatime of the Soul

Cafe Nero, Oxford Street. My refuge from the world. They know me as 'the man who orders tea with soya milk', but today I show them I am more than a cup of tea. I drink coffee, too...

I sense merriment a-brewin'!

A New Era

Following my endeavours to establish an official domain on the internet (currently in negotiations for a domain availible at competitive prices!) I have discovered the wonders of blogging. This is not my first blog, but is my first official blog. My numerous attempts to establish a website have seen many a blog post, but these are to be discarded now I have discovered Blogger.

What inticed me to join Blogger was my mobile phone. Amongst it's many attributes that make it more than a mere commodity, more of a hand-held companion, it has a blogging service that directly links to my Blogger account. It not only accesses Facebook, Twitter, and utilises an accurate GPS system, but when I take a picture with it's camera I can upload instantaneously to my blog! This means any random thoughts or events I encounter during my travels, I may update the cyber-population with anything from the mundane to the absurd.

This prospect probably fills many with excitement, anticipation and nausea, so I shan't delay with finishing this post. Especially since I've run out of things to say, (which is a first I might add!)

Welcome to the B-Logs.